Friday, May 13, 2011


I fear I have reached the point in my life where all my pants/shorts must be made of that fabulous stretchy material that makes it so you can gain weight and retain water without having to buy a whole new wardrobe...

What's it called.....

Wait...let me check the tag in my pants....

Oh yes....  Spandex!

I only need 1% of the stuff in my pants....  It doesn't seem like much....  But OH the freedom when you add it into the mix!

Right about now I would give my first born for the chance to meet the genius that discovered it!

Today, we had a preview of how warm our summer is going to be and I broke down and got out my pile of shorts from last year.

In the past I have managed to lose enough weight to wear the shorts from the year before.

Not this year.  I tried on every single pair and not one would allow me to button them up!

Sometime over the winter my ass backside decided to relocate a little lower and my hips have decided they are all too comfortable with the extra few pounds of meat I packed on.

Apparently, year 39 is the year you put away those cute girly girl shorts and opt for something a little more....well....appropriate for your age.

Gone are the tighter t-shirts and shorter shorts. 

Oh, who am I kidding, it happened last year but I wiggled (and jiggled) my way into those shorts and t-shirts despite the muffin top screaming at me to 'please for the love of God, wear something that fits!  You're embarassing us all!"

I was kind of hoping (most likely like every other woman on the planet reaching 40) that the Universe had forgotten I was getting up there in age.  I was kind of hoping it would give me another couple of years grace before things started to go downhill...

Since I love to look upon the positive in every situation.  I will end this blog post with this thought...

SHOPPING TRIP!!!!!!     woot woot!


  1. Don't worry, Jenn. you are still beautiful inside and out :)

  2. Yeah, I've had waaaay too many threesomes with Ben & Jerry this past winter. And whoever invented Spandex should be given a Nobel Prize. If you wear a skirt made of bacon though, I've heard those are stretchy and that the men love it!

  3. Marisa; If I wore a skirt of bacon, I'd be missing some legs! :) lol
    Thanks for stopping by!

  4. Thanks fretworkpeddler! That's so sweet!

  5. ahh, I love your humor Jenn! keep it coming :)

  6. :) Mandy, I'm trying....I'm trying :) lol
    Love ya!


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