Saturday, June 20, 2015

Thirty Days

**Disclaimer:  This post is about sex.  FYI:  I have permission to write about this from my hubby.  He feels it's important to spread the word in order to help others.  What a nice guy!**

A few months ago I stumbled upon a woman by the name of Kim Anami.  Kim is a sex coach.  Her mind is wide open and she's on a mission is to save the planet by teaching us that great sex is a gift we give eachother and the world.

I've watched all of her videos numerous times and have turned hubby on (no pun intended) to the information as well.  He loves her candid approach and her step by step techniques to mastering the art of pleasure.

One challenge that Kim suggests is 30 days of sexual intimacy.  It could be sex with a partner or sex with yourself.  It doesn't matter who is doing the pleasuring just as long as you are engaging and allowing yourself to receive pleasure.  She also suggests that it not be quickie sex; she is adamant that you take the time to have what she calls 'gourmet sex'.  To really dive in and appreciate the experience.  I approached hubby about doing the challenge and gratefully he was up for it (omg the puns are everywhere!).

The best part about the 30 day challenge was the commitment we were making to eachother.  No cop outs.  No "I've got a headache" or "I'm too tired".  We knew that sometime during the day there was going to be sex without excuses and that knowledge seemed to be very comforting.  It seemed to take the fear of rejection out of the equation.

Not only was I eager to rekindle the intimacy in our lives by committing to this challenge; I was anxious to experience pleasure daily and see where the experience would take me.

For years hubby has dealt with my sexual rejection and until we were smack dab in the middle of that 30 days I had no idea how much damage we had allowed to accumulate over the years.  Both of us had ingrained expectations and fears; as well we had basically shut off our pleasure zones to avoid more rejection and disappointment.  Before this challenge I would describe our sex life as non-existent.  It was one of those things that got put at the bottom of the list of things to do and was usually reserved for special occasions (like the good china).  I rarely experienced orgasm (I realized that is because I had no muscle tone in my vaginal walls - no muscle tone equals no feeling!) and felt like it was something I had to do to be a good wife.  I tell you this because it's important for you to know that if I can do this so can you!

For 30 days there was fun and enjoyment; there were also tears and warm, tender embraces.  We talked for hours about things we've NEVER talked about.  We healed so much in that 30 days of consistent intimacy!  It's been nothing short of miraculous in my opinion.

There are physical and mental benefits to this challenge.  It's not just about the pleasure; though I think that's enough of a reason all on it's own.  Receiving pleasure daily has created a sense of calm in my mind and body.  I no longer have lower back and hip pain and stiffness.  I am happier and more patient.  I laugh more.  I am in love with my body and feel like I've lost weight even though the numbers on the scale haven't changed.  I feel like I'm 17 again.  I have more vitality and I am open to new experiences.  I make decisions more clearly and easily.

As anyone knows, 30 days of consistent action of any kind creates a habit.  This challenge will set you up for a life of consistent, lovely, enjoyable intimacy.  It will demand that you continue to receive and give pleasure as you were always meant to do.  It will beg you to keep opening to a deeper understanding of who you are and what you are capable of.

Knowledge is power!

No matter where you are at in your sex life; whether you are single, married or dating; consider opening yourself up a bit to exploring Kim's (or an equally fabulous sex coach) website.  She's got a ton of free information and lots of YouTube videos for you to enjoy.  I'll warn you she is raw and real.  She holds nothing back.

So I will leave you with that for now.  There is more information to come.  I've discovered many interesting things about sex that we weren't taught growing up that have really helped me understand my sexuality.

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