ch ch ch ch changes.........

I took a nap late this afternoon and when I woke up I felt completely off balance.

WTF?

I had a fabulous day preparing 4 beautiful women in their Reiki journey and thought I'd reward myself (and indulge in my slight fatigue) by taking a short nap.

That short nap turned into 2 hours.

And when I got up, my whole body felt like it didn't belong.  I felt shaky and almost panicked.

My day (in fact my entire week) did not indicate anything to be anxious about, quite the opposite.  And yet here I was feeling panic and anxiety after a nap?!?!?!

It's moments like these when I know with the depths of my soul that we as a species are experiencing mind blowing changes.

For the last couple of weeks I've been surfing the net for information on 'ascension symptoms'.  Looking for any proof that I am in fact 'normal'and that I am not losing my mind.

I have linked to some of those sites for your interest.

You want this - a great site that tells it like it is, differentiates between 'awakening' and 'ascension'
Good ole facebook - this is a great facebook connection that can help you tap into what's going on symptom wise
Beacons of  Light - I subscribe to updates from this site and have also enrolled in one of their classes.  A great and informative site for everything you need to know about what is happening with planetary shifts and why they are happening
Karen Bishop - this girl got me through some really tough times.  She doesn't do alot of regular updates, but this site will send you to some of her most recent :)

It's important to become connected to others who understand or at least can sympathize with what you are going through.  Some of us are feeling these symptoms and changes more intensely than others, and still more have no idea what they are feeling, they just know that it is strange and unusual!

I find tapping into my intuition to be the most effective way to combat my symptoms.  I love to journal how each of my days has gone, what were my feelings and experiences, and how does it support and prove to me that I am changing and growing as a spiritual being.

I also find that getting out my art supplies helps me to channel the energy a little more productively (at least I can sell the artwork, I can't sell anything if I sit on my butt all day feeling like a lump of mashed potatoes :)

So I hope that the above links help you out and get you feeling more 'human' again : )  It's nice to know that we are not alone.

And you are definitely not alone!

Whose walking your path?

I don't know about you, but I get really excited about my spiritual/personal journey. 

I sometimes get so excited that I feel that others need to be on the same journey as I am.

This tends to happen alot with my husband and I.  And recently the Universe reminded me that my husbands personal journey is none of my business!  (you gotta love it when you get those reminders)

It all happened while we were taking part in a 10 day metabolic cleanse with Metagenics.  We were doing fine, eliminating foods from our diet everyday and taking the "prescribed" product to help our bodies eliminate toxins.

Around day 5 my hubby started to get a little grumpy about what he could and couldn't eat (we were down to eating only broccoli, cabbage, cauliflower, kale, apples & pears).  Generally he is a meat and potatoes guy with a strong tolerance for his wife's nutritional tricks (which I have to admit once in a while border on obsessions).

Anyway....

We had a brief phone conversation one day about how he was starving because he didn't know what he could and couldn't eat and I reminded him that the instructions were well laid out in the booklet that lay in front of him on the kitchen counter. 

I hung up the phone and felt my body tense up.  How could he not know what to eat?  How hard is it to open the fridge and pull out some veggies and eat them?  Why was he choosing to be so difficult?  Why is this so hard for him to do, it's only 10 days for goodness sake?  ARGH!!!

I no sooner got all bent out of shape when it dawned on me.

He only chose to do this cleanse because I came home with the product for him.  He only chose to do this because he believes in me and my vision for a healthier lifestyle.  He only chose to do this because I was so excited and convinced him it was "the right thing to do" for us.

Hold up! 

For "us"?  Yah, right...  Cause I don't have enough living to do on my own, I have to live his life for him too....

The truth:  I dragged him into this whole cleanse thing because I wanted him to follow along MY path.  I want him to live a healthier lifestyle for ME.

But his path is NOT my path.  Not even close.  I forget this every once in a while because he is so supportive of me, and it's not fair to him when he gets caught in my "best laid plans".

I think in our excitement of all that we are personally learning in our experience, we are eager to put what we have learned onto someone we love, in the hopes that that person will experience greater self awareness.

Think back to a time when someone has put their own expectations of what your personal journey should look like on you.  How did that feel?  Did it feel like you weren't being trusted with your own life?  Did it feel like someone didn't believe in your own talents and abilities?  Did it feel uncomfortable?  Did it feel disrespectful?

I know for me, I can reason away my behaviour in the guise of "but I love them, I want what's best for them".  As much as this is true, sometimes we can show an even greater love to someone by letting them live for themselves, in a way that is comfortable for them.

This isn't always easy to do.  It's getting easier for me to do this with my husband and yet a little more difficult to do with my teenage sons :)  But still, everytime I catch myself putting my standards upon them it gives me another opportunity to readjust and get back on my own path.

Afterall, if I'm walking on someone else's path.  Then who is walking on mine?

What room are you living in?

This quote is speaking to me today.

"There is an Indian Belief that everyone is in a house of four rooms: A physical, a mental, an emotional and a spiritual. Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room everyday, even if only to keep it aired, we are not complete."    -- Rumer Godden

Lately I've been paying more attention to which "room" I am living in and have realized that I am sometimes afraid to leave that room and venture into another.

The emotional room seems to have been one that I visit less frequently and it all depends on the emotions that are waiting for me there.
 
I find lately it's becoming easier and easier to show my happy emotions and harder and harder to show my not so happy emotions.
 
Anyone who knows me well knows that I can't hide my emotions.  I wear them on my face and carry them in my body.  Expressing them verbally is another issue altogether. 
 
Every once in a while I wake up in a mood that is quite edgy, sometimes sarcastic and always witty.  And if I'm being honest here, it is a really fun mood to be in.  Personally, it's the mood I feel most creative in, it's the mood where I get more accomplished and appreciate myself more. 
 
And yet, there is a small piece of me that says "you can't show this to other people, this is not who you want them to see.  This personality is not cute, calm and inviting.  Stay home and don't talk to anyone while you are like this". 
 
That's the voice of the person inside of me that isn't comfortable with her authentic power. 
 
Authentic power is when you are living in all 4 of those rooms and you are comfortable with each of them.  Authentic power is never hiding who you are whether you think it's good or bad, it's important to show the world your many wonderful facets of being human.
 
If only to inspire someone else to do the same.
 
It's a myth that "spiritually conscious" people never experience anger, resentment, jealousy, shame and have to be loving and kind every moment of every day (Mother Teresa was an extremely special woman, we weren't all cut out to be just like her).  Each of us is here to experience all of life, every emotion, every challenge for the sake of our own personal growth.

The point of the spiritual journey is to walk through all of our experiences and learn from them, and that means feeling the emotions that come up throughout the experience. 

We rarely learn a lesson of great importance while walking on cloud 9 with a smile on our face and a spring in our step!

So, this quote is a reminder to me to visit my emotional room every day, check in, take a look around and see what needs to be addressed without judgement, without fear.

Your true nature

If you are one who is consciously aware of your journey here on earth, you may work very hard to reach the next "level" of consciousness or awakening. While you are working hard are you taking time to en-JOY your work? En-JOY your learning? En-JOY your moments of "aha"?

I for one, have rarely enjoyed my journey. Although, I have enjoyed looking back and seeing how far I have come, occasionally though I get a glimpse at how far I actually still have to go and how much more I still need to learn. And that can be sometimes overwhelming.

Let's for a moment remove the "job" of growing spiritually and consider ourselves already there.

There now doesn't that just feel better?

No more big lessons, no more climbing the ladder of enlightenment.

Truth be told there is no such thing as reaching enlightenment, because you are already there. There is nothing to strive for, because you came into this world embodying your fullest potential.

But until today your mind has been telling you that you are not good enough unless you are working hard to get somewhere, you are not a spiritual being unless you are doing something spiritual.

Do you even know what it looks and feels like to be enlightened?

I don't.

I've seen many people whom I have been told or have believed them to be enlightened, and let me tell you there are no 2 alike! Each one has a different sense of humour about their awakeness, each one dresses differently, speaks differently and even communicate their wisdom differently.

Every thought that you have throughout your day places a judgement and creates a distance between your "now" nature and your "true" nature.

There is so much untruth floating around in our heads that it is quite easy to lose our connection to our true self.

Take 5 seconds today to breathe and to say hello to your true self. To allow it to come forward and show you it's brilliance, to show you it's creativity, it's knowledge, it's splendor.

The beautiful thing about your true nature is that it is never gone. It is always just there waiting for acknowledgement.

I don't care what your past is. I don't care what you have done in this world that you have judged as being wrong. Your true nature is still there.

The blue of the sky does not disappear just because the storm clouds come in. It is hiding and waiting beyond those storm clouds and when the clouds clear out shines the sun and there is the blue sky once again.

Just because you can't see it all the time, doesn't mean your true nature isn't there.

Find out for yourself.