What's the worst that can happen?

This is a great question to ask yourself when you are stuck in a situation and feeling a ton of fear about making a decision that might not be too popular with the rest of the world.

I asked myself this question last week.

In fact, I ask myself this question alot.

And what I have found is that everytime I ask and answer this question, I find that the worst isn't really that bad.

In fact, if I think about it, what I would consider being the 'worst' thing that could ever happen, has actually already happened to me.

Nothing the mind can make up at this point holds a candle to some of the things I've already experienced.

And I would suspect that you would feel the same way (unless you've lived in a bubble all of your life).

Think of the worst thing that has ever happened to you in this lifetime.  Think about the time you felt most alone, most afraid, most sad.

Now think about the fears that are holding you back from achieving a level of success in your life.

Now ask yourself. What is truly the worst that can possibly happen?

If the worst happens, will I be okay? Will I overcome it?

For me, being rejected is a fate worse than death.  Yet I reject myself all of the time, I've been rejected by many people in the past and I've done some rejecting myself from time to time.

Guess what?  I'm still living.  I'm still breathing.  In fact, I am better than ever despite all that rejection going on!

Hmmm.

So really what is the worst that can happen if you make that career change (even if it is a pay cut); dump that boyfriend/girlfriend who doesn't treat you right (even if he/she tells you you won't find anyone else) or spend the day lounging in a comfy chair (when you know you should be doing something more productive)?

Chances are it's not as bad as what your mind has been telling you.

To fear...or not to fear....

In my last blog I talked about being offered an amazing opportunity to take part in a retreat as a presenter.

It wasn't until I declined the offer and had a short discussion with my friends over dinner that I realized that I was feeling scared and intimidated by the thought of presenting in front of all of those fabulous people.  And I was covering it up with all kinds of other excuses.

I want you to know what I did with this situation, so that you know it can be done and hopefully it will help you when you are stuck in fear.

First, I emailed a good friend of mine and admitted to her that I was feeling scared.  She acknowledged what I was saying and added how exciting it would be if I could change my decision and move past my fears.  She also shared how great it was that I was noticing my fears and admitting to them.  (When you admit to your fears, they somehow magically diffuse to a point where you can see a little more clearly and gain forward movement).

I then made the decision to admit my fears to the coordinator of the retreat.  I wanted to be completely honest with her about why I had originally decided to decline her very gracious offer and asked if it was possible if there was still a space available for me to participate as a presenter. 

She replied with an amazing "You're in!!!"

And now....

Now I am planning my "workshop" for that weekend, I am fine tuning my bio and getting ready to send it over to her tonight.

The feeling of overcoming these fears is amazing.  I have been living with them my entire life!

The fears of not being good enough, or of being judged are common amongst women. 

It is however, imperative that we overcome these fears. 

If for no other reason than to prove to yourself that you can!

Note to self: get out of the way!

Does it ever feel like there is always something getting in the way of your success or holding you back from getting what you want out of life?

It often feels this way to me.

I can go along for months gaining momentum with each opportunity that comes up only to find that one day I wake up to a brick wall where there was no brick wall before!

I often wondered why this happens. 

Well, maybe "wondered" isn't the right term.  I've always known why this happens, I CHOOSE to ignore it, hoping it will go away!

Does this sound familiar?

For example, the one area of my life that could use a boost is my relationship with my business.

I can pinpoint exact moments when I sabotage this relationship and to be honest I am no longer disappointed when things don't go exactly as I had originally planned because...well....I know I'm sabotaging it.

So today someone asked me the question "in the deepest part of yourself why are you sabotaging your relationship with your business?" 

My answer shocked the heck out of me.

I replied "I'm afraid of becoming successful because then I may not have the time to spend with my family the way I want to spend it". 

I equate "success" with working like a dog 24/7 because that is all I've known, it's what I was taught.  I have not fully integrated the vision of success being whatever the hell I WANT it to be.  And the reality is it would look like having oodles of time to spend with my family!

The other thought I have associated with success is "who do you think you are, what have you possibly done to deserve success?"

The moment I spoke the words it felt utterly ridiculous.  Who is afraid of success?  What a stupid fear?  I'm so ashamed that I've had this fear and it's been holding me back...

But wait a minute....

In the moment I voiced that fear.  In the moment I finally acknowledged it's existence instead of sweeping it under the rug I felt a shift in my perception.

I had been holding myself back through indulging this fear.  It doesn't have anything to do with anyone but me!

I began to notice my whole body start to feel heavy, a calm and peaceful relaxed heaviness came over me and I could feel that the acknowledgement had somewhat released the grip that this fear had on me.

To me fears indicate a missing piece to a puzzle.  It's frustrating to have missing pieces to a puzzle, isn't it?  If we dig deeper into our fears we begin to uncover those missing pieces and bit by bit we can put the puzzle together and in doing so we make ourselves whole once again.

What is your biggest fear when it comes to meeting your full life potential?

Are you ignoring this fear hoping it will go away?

What is it going to take for you to release this fear and take the next step toward living an inspired life?